your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
