so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize