Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
