a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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