Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Randomize
