I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
