walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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