i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
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