Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
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