FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
i think my cat just said my name.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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