Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
