Im at strip club and am horny
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
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He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
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Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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