Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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