Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
