Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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