Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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