Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize