Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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