it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
my liver is dry heaving
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
