Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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