I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
