Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
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he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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