I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
