Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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