Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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