i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
