trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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