She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize