I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize