so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
