you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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