What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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