Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
