____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize