so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
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Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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