when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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