Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize