i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
