At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
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i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
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But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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