WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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