I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize