Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
