dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
