i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
