ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
