You drinking a lot?
Define a lot
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
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First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
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I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll