So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.