I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
