All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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