and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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