He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
